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Dear Andreus,

My younger brother and I are both gay, and both in committed relationships.  It’s kind of cool, because we are always doing stuff together. The four of us plan trips and do a lot of double date nights out.  Recently, my brother’s boyfriend approached me saying that he would like to have sex with me just once, and it would be our little secret. Not only did it catch me by surprise, but now I feel awkward around him.  I want to tell my brother so badly, but I don’t want to cause problems between them. What should I do?

Sincerely,

Timothy S.

Dear Timothy,

I can completely see how this would make you uncomfortable.  Boundaries have been crossed, and you certainly need to address them.  There two courses of action you can take. The first would be to pull him aside and tell him how you feel about him making an advance towards you, and request that he never do it again or you will tell your brother.  The other is to just go directly to your brother and tell him. Only you can judge what the better option is based on your relationship with your brother. But know that if you don’t address it, it could be a bigger problem later. 

Dear Andreus,

My boyfriend comes over frequently, but I don’t like him staying the night.  He asked me why I never invite him for overnights, and it is for a reason that I am afraid to tell him.  He farts in his sleep, excessively. I can’t deal. I don’t know how to tell him, because I don’t want to embarrass him or hurt his feelings.  How can I tactfully approach this?

Sincerely,

Carl J.

Dear Carl,

Well, I can certainly see why you avoid overnights.  As human as that is, it is not sexy at all. So, for lack of a better way of saying it, it’s time to “clear the air.”  You should sit down and have a very gentle talk with him about it. It could be embarrassing yes, but he may not even be aware that he is doing it.  There are over-the-counter options out there that help with that sort of thing. It is a delicate conversation, but if you are planning to continue dating him, then it’s best that you address it.  Once it is taken care of, your sheets will only be rising up from the heat of passion!