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Dear Andreus,

I am in school and working two jobs. My boyfriend is quite comfortable financially, and though we don’t live together, he has asked me to stop working and focus on school and he will pay my bills for me.  The offer sounds amazing, but I am afraid to leave my affairs to someone else. It would help a great deal, but I don’t know what to do. Is it a good idea, or should I keep going as I have been?

Sincerely,

Jose P.

Dear Jose,

I must admit that this is probably the sweetest and most supportive thing I have heard in a long time. Does he have an available brother? Lol! However, in my honest opinion you are right to have some hesitation.  For a couple reasons, this is not a good idea. First, you will lose your sense of independence because you will become reliant upon his finances to sustain you. Secondly, these types of scenarios give a single person complete control over the relationship, which should always be as equal as possible. What I can suggest though is maybe letting go of one job and accepting some support from him. That way you maintain independence, and he is allowed to support you to an extent. I hope that helps you a bit. Best of luck in you endeavors. 

Dear Andreus,

I have a close friend whose partner passed away about six months ago. Another one of our friends is now in pursuit of him. All of us, including the deceased partner were close friends. I don’t think it’s cool for my friend to be pursuing him out of respect for our deceased friend. Am I wrong for this?

Sincerely,

Gregory J. 

Dear Gregory,

Ultimately, though you are being a concerned friend, it is not your business. They are both adults. No one is cheating on anyone else. Your friend passed away, leaving your other friend widowed. Your friend moving forward with his life is the best thing anyone can do. Might it be too soon, maybe so, but that is solely his decision to make. I would certainly not interfere. If it works or doesn’t work out, they will find out soon enough, but everyone deserves a shot at love and happiness.