Boy, were you in the dark when you told the skinny, 120 lb. guy who was attracted to guys twice his weight to “hit the gym and become what you want to attract.” That’s some pretty suck-ass advice. I’m skinny, too, and I have no intention of gaining 100 pounds to be like the type of guy I like to have sex with. And most of the big guys I f–k don’t want me to either. They seem to like me exactly as small as I am….
Boy, were you in the dark when you told the skinny, 120 lb. guy who was attracted to guys twice his weight to “hit the gym and become what you want to attract.” That’s some pretty suck-ass advice. I’m skinny, too, and I have no intention of gaining 100 pounds to be like the type of guy I like to have sex with. And most of the big guys I f–k don’t want me to either. They seem to like me exactly as small as I am.
Skinny could inquire about Chub/Chaser groups or go on the net and explore Biggercity, ChubNet, Bear411, the list goes on. He could also try typing “+bear+gay+cub+whatever” in his favorite search engine. Woody, I resent your kind of advice. Skinny doesn’t need to hit the gym. He just needs to know that there are resources both locally and on the web for guys like us.
— Hoping you see the light & weight
Dear Hoping:
Christ, if there’s one thing I can’t stand it’s an exception prancing around like it’s a rule. Well, good for you that all the muscle studs are panting after you, Mr. Hank of Hair on a Broomstick. But back on Planet Earth, the vast majority of muscle-bound guys are not looking for bony guys to hang their beef on.
If you’re so skinny the airlines suggest saving money and faxing yourself to your destination, the odds that beefy guys are going to stuff their meat in your overhead compartment are not very good.
Of course SOME guys are attracted to their opposites but there aren’t many. The “opposites attract” theory applies mostly to personalities, not bodies. Even guys who are attracted to radically different guys still tend to like the same physical characteristics they possess. For instance, inter-racial couples. When was the last time you saw a tall, fat black guy with a short skinny white one? I’m not saying these pairings don’t exist. I’m saying good luck trying to find one.
Your point of looking in the web, taking out ads and searching for guys looking for their opposites is well taken. Only problem is, there must be an echo chamber in your brain when you read the original column because I already suggested that.
Yes, Skinny could and should do all those things but he could also up the odds of success if he’d push himself as hard in the gym as I do in the bars. My advice still stands. And it goes not just for people trying to attract somebody with certain physical qualities but emotional ones as well: Become the kind of person you want to attract and you will attract the kind of person you’re attracted to.