To quote Melissa Etheridge, ain’t it heavy? For some perspective on recent assaults on LGBTQ+ rights brought by the Trump administration, turning to a gay icon with decades of experience in resilience and unity is always worthwhile.
Enter Etheridge, who tells me she’s not quite the grandmother she once imagined herself becoming — though, in many ways, she is a grandmother to many of us in the LGBTQ+ community. Our community draws inspiration from her strength, activism and the unwavering fortitude she’s embodied since her highly public coming out in 1993. Through the unapologetic truth expressed in her music and embodied in her public persona, Etheridge’s voice has consistently carried a message of hope and authenticity.
For Etheridge, the stage is more than a place for entertainment — it’s a platform for healing and connection. Currently on tour, she’ll soon embark on what is bound to be one of the queerest tours of 2025, a co-headlining run with the Indigo Girls that kicks off in Colorado in July. Her message remains clear: through joy, music and inclusion, we can weather life’s storms together.
I caught up with Etheridge, 63, during a particularly trying week, as the L.A. fires left her and many others reeling. Power outages at her home almost forced her to reschedule our interview, but she and her wife, Linda Wallem, eventually found refuge at a hotel in Santa Barbara.
In this candid conversation, Etheridge opens up about the transformative power of rebuilding, her long history with the Indigo Girls and shares lessons learned from decades of being a trailblazer. She also teases new music inspired by both personal and global experiences.
We’ve connected throughout the years through some challenging times. I can’t imagine what you’re feeling right now.
Well, we are right on the edge. We’re in Calabasas, so that’s on the edge of the Palisades fire, and so my house is going to be fine. Our power’s up. We did evacuate, but my house is going to be fine. To know that the Palisades are gone, it is just like, ah. It doesn’t hit my head, and this is my city. This is where I eat. Restaurants I eat at once a month, they’re gone. And it’s overwhelming. I know it will come back so beautifully, and so I know it’s going to be a good thing in the long, beautiful run as change is, but man, this is devastating. This is crazy.
Where do you go in your head in a time like this? Do you turn to music?
My wife and I were talking last night because we’re up in Santa Barbara — we got away far enough and we’re safe and OK — and then you turn on the news and you see it, and you can’t go backwards now. There is no backwards anymore. It’s not there. And when we think, wow, moving ahead, this is a city that was built on dreamers and their dreams. It was built to entertain the world. It grew because it was a place of dreams and hopes, and change and newness, and it’s quite a large industry now there, and a beautiful city that’s grown around it filled with many different industries. And I think this event and this change is going to influence what you see in the arts, in theater, television, and sports.
I think in 10 years; we’ll look back and see how the change that came out of this happened because it takes little petty conversations about liberal and conservative and just throws that out the window. This little tug of war we’ve been involved in the last 10 years or whatever, it really blows that out, and it’s like, “Wow, as we move forward now, let’s make sure the institutions we create and the housing and the infrastructure is what we’ve been spouting all these years.” That it’s a forward-thinking, diversified, embracing kind of city we want to build.
Well, it feels almost awkward to talk to you about work. I know for me, it’s good to go into my writing head in difficult times, so maybe that’s also good for you.
That’s exactly what I did. I’m about to record my next album and I’m going into the studio in March, and so I’ve been really writing and just soaking everything in. And last night, all of a sudden, I was like, “Oh god, I want to write a song about this experience.” But then it’s like, “Where do you start?” And I think I need to absorb this experience a little bit. I wouldn’t be surprised if there was a song about Los Angeles or Hollywood.
How did you and the Indigo Girls, Amy Ray and Emily Saliers, decide on “Yes We Are” as the name of this tour?
Well, we did about 11 shows last year. It was part of my tour and their tour, and we worked it out, and we had such a blast together. We caught up. We loved the audience. The audience that came to see us was on fire. They were enthusiastic. It was very cathartic, like, god, everything we’ve been going through, let’s just remember the songs we love. Remember the songs that made us feel good, and we just soaked it in. And it was multi-generational, that’s what I loved.
There were daughters with their mothers, with their grandmothers. The whole family would come, the husbands’ wives. Of course, it was very queer, but it wasn’t exclusively queer at all. There were a lot of straight folks out there listening to that music they liked in the ’90s.
What conversations went into the name of the tour between you and the girls?
It was just a few texts sent back and forth. And I was like, “I don’t know, ‘Power of Three,’ maybe?” And actually, my manager said, “What do you think about ‘Yes We Are’?” I thought, “Oh, that’s just a reference to me.” But Emily said, “Oh my god, I love Yes We Are.” And we both were enthusiastic about it, and we love the way it feels and what it brings back.
What do you remember from first meeting the Indigo Girls?
My first album [in 1988] was out when I met them, and their big album wasn’t out yet. And I remember they were such fans. They were just really, really sweet. Someone brought them over to my house, and I didn’t know who they were, and it wasn’t until I listened to them and went, “Oh, this is great.” I wore that “Closer to Fine” album out. It was a staple of that time, and I just loved seeing everything they did. It was just a really special time back then.
There is now a queer uprising happening in reaction to the current administration. What do you say to young queer activists having seen so much yourself, especially the ones who may think they’re fighting for something that is a new fight?
Well, is it a new fight? Is it or not? Because I think what’s always considered is, “Hey, I just want to be considered one of the many,” and this idea of “all of us — except for them,” is being tried in our society. That’s what we’re really saying, because people can’t even understand the many different layers and differences in our own community. So, it’s just not even, “Give us these things, stop taking away these things, stop taking away the protections that you would give any other human being.”
We are just human beings, and it shows what being human means. And so, I would encourage the activists now, people in the LGBTQ+ community, to work for something and not against something. It’s when we work against it that we give more energy to it than it deserves, so let’s work for inclusion. Let’s work for unity. And let’s be an example of being a unified community ourselves, who may say, “Look, I don’t understand some things, but being a human being is a right. And you can make whatever choice you want, whether it’s to change your gender identity or to be a Republican and hate. You have the right to do that.” And it’s very hard, but let’s be the example of that. Accepting and loving ourselves is the example. Let’s show how that looks, and that’s the best thing we can do to work for and fight for inclusion.
How do you feel about Trump leading the country for the next four years?
I don’t have any more F’s to give. The night of the election, I went, “That’s it, I am not even going to pay attention to him anymore. I’m not going to give him any of my fear, any of my disappointment. I’m not going to give any of that anymore.”
How do you plan on accomplishing that?
Well, I limit my social media time, and I stopped giving my attention to him and the weird ideology. I give my attention to things that bring me joy, to things that give me hope. Like I was saying, I want to be the example. And when I’m afraid of things that I have no control of, that’s a horrible way to feel.
So start by taking care of myself. Start by giving the understanding and attention and love that I wish they would give. I’m going to give it to myself and everyone I see. I’m going to, again, be an example of what I wish to see in the world.
Regarding your upcoming tour with the Indigo Girls, you both have extensive catalogs. How are you approaching the setlist?
I think I might be dipping into some of the more hopeful songs on my repertoire — not being afraid to be political, but to do it in a way that inspires.
I think a lot of people are looking forward to experiencing some community in a space where they feel loved and accepted.
Absolutely. Please, please, because it’s a safe space. It’s a loving space. And again, we’re not there pushing against a lot of stuff. We are showing love and inclusion, and really how we still feel joy and hope, and it’s still alive, and come sing the songs with us.
