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Hey Woody,

My boyfriend is so ashamed of his body we only make love in the dark, and only in the missionary position. How can I get him to be more adventurous without having him go on a diet? I don’t like these skinny bitches I see flouncing around the park. I like a little junk in the trunk!

– Wanting more

 

Hey Woody,

My boyfriend is so ashamed of his body we only make love in the dark, and only in the missionary position. How can I get him to be more adventurous without having him go on a diet? I don’t like these skinny bitches I see flouncing around the park. I like a little junk in the trunk!

– Wanting more

Dear Wanting:

The reason he likes the missionary position –and only the missionary position—is that it’s the only position that keeps you from seeing his body. People ashamed of their bodies, scared of having other people look at them in the nude, only feel comfortable in positions that prevent their partner from seeing what they consider shameful.

Start the healing process by telling him how much you appreciate his physical appearance. Be specific. Saying you love his body is good. Saying you love the shape of his legs is better. Saying you couldn’t concentrate at work because you were obsessing over his penis is even better.

Those are the “do’s.” Here are the “don’ts” (and you know, the “don’ts” are always more fun): When you’re in a restaurant? Hand him a menu, not an estimate. When you’re being romantic? Whisper sweet nothings in his ears, just make sure they’re not edible. Or insulting. It’s one thing to say, “You are the reason the sun comes up in the morning.” It’s another to say, “You are the reason the Earth wobbles on its axis.”

Ok, back to the “Do’s.” Introduce candles to your love life. They smooth out skin tones, hide imperfections and create a romantic aura. Or simply put table lamps on the floor. The up lighting creates a dramatic effect without putting an unwanted spotlight on his body.

One of the best things you can do is to give him the tools to go from being self-conscious to feeling self-confident. Buy him the best book I’ve seen on the subject– The Body Image Workbook: An 8-Step Program for Learning to Like Your Looks.

Hey Woody,

Is there any harm in lying on a tanning bed in the nude?

– Butt First

Dear Butt First,

The ultraviolet rays of a tanning bed won’t do any more harm to your penis than they do to your back. But that’s not saying much, since the consensus among dermatologists is that tanning beds cause skin cancer.

Every day more than a million Americans go to the nation’s 50,000 tanning facilities. The ultraviolet radiation these “beds” give off is a carcinogen just like tobacco, according to the latest study in The Journal of the American Academy of Dermatology. As one of the study’s authors notes, “Radiation use has been declared a carcinogen by the National Institutes of Health.”

Half the guys you like are turned off by your body language. Turn them on with the secrets in woody’s new ebook: ATTRACT HOTTER GUYS with the Secrets & Science of Sexual Body Language. Available at www.mikealvear.com/ebook

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