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Hey, Woody,

I love kissing. As far as I’m concerned if you’re not a good kisser, you’re not a good lay. Even when I watch porno, I notice I get extra hard when I see the on-screen studs kissing deeply. I’ve been dating this creamy guy for a few months, and to my shock and horror, he doesn’t really like to kiss much. He’s told me I’m the best kisser he’s ever had but that he just doesn’t get into it that much. What can I do to turn this around? He’s perfect in every other way.

-Tonguing for more

Hey, Woody,

I love kissing. As far as I’m concerned if you’re not a good kisser, you’re not a good lay. Even when I watch porno, I notice I get extra hard when I see the on-screen studs kissing deeply. I’ve been dating this creamy guy for a few months, and to my shock and horror, he doesn’t really like to kiss much. He’s told me I’m the best kisser he’s ever had but that he just doesn’t get into it that much. What can I do to turn this around? He’s perfect in every other way.

-Tonguing for more

Dear Tonguing,

I’m right there with you, babe. Sex without kissing is like eating dinner alone in a steak restaurant–even when you’re served a sirloin, the meat’s still missing. Many men, myself included, consider kissing more intimate than sexual intercourse. Breathing somebody else’s breath, caressing your cheeks with his, tasting each other’s tongue—these are all incredibly intimate acts. In fact, that may be the reason why Mr. Creamy won’t spread his lips as far as he spreads his legs. If he’s been deeply hurt, one way of protecting himself is not to get too intimitate too fast, and that may mean putting his lips on ice. If that’s the case you’re going to need time, patience and understanding to overcome it. If you haven’t already, tell him how important kissing is to you.

Don’t blame, request. Try, “Kissing you is really important to me, it turns me on and makes me feel closer to you,” not “why won’t you kiss me more?” Give him some time and enjoy him without putting a lot of demands on him. If he doesn’t come around, you have some tough choices ahead of you.

Hey Woody,

Sometimes during sex, right before I ejaculate I get cramps in my legs. Being seized by pain right before the hottest point of sex is not my idea of fun, but it seems to be happening more regularly. The cramps are cramping my style, Wood-man, what can I do?

-Looking for cramp-ons

Dear Crampy,

Cramps are not unusual in sexual situations. They can be caused by spending long periods in one position. So my advice is, duh, change positions, or don’t stay in them for very long. But your problem might be simpler than that. Are you drinking enough water? Dehydration is one of the most common causes of cramps. Take a break from slurping your partner and slurp some agua, stiff-boy. Cramping can also occur if you’re not eating right.

Electrolyte imbalances like low sodium, potassium, calcium or magnesium can make your legs salute involuntarily, even when there ain’t a commissioned officer in sight. Check your diet and make sure you’re getting enough.

Half the guys you like are turned off by your body language. Turn them on with the secrets in woody’s new ebook: ATTRACT HOTTER GUYS with the Secrets & Science of Sexual Body Language. Available at www.mikealvear.com/ebook

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