Dear Andreus,

I have been married to my partner for 12 years now.  For the most part, things are great – but like most couples, we have our issues.  One of the things that really gets to me, is that my husband decides everything for us all the time.  He will decide what we have for dinner, or where we are going, or what we are doing for the day.  He will even interrupt and talk for me when we are having conversations with other people.  Whenever I try to say something or make decisions, he talks over me, and then says that he knows what I want.  In the beginning, I thought it was cute.  But now, I feel like I have no voice of my own.  What do I do?


Jordan M.

Dear Jordan,

I am going to state the obvious here and say that this is something that should have been addressed years ago.  Ultimately, we teach people how to treat us.  This happens by what we allow, and what we reinforce.  Old habits die hard, so this is something that even though addressed, may not change right away. If you feel like you no longer have a voice, then take your voice back.  You are within your rights to make decisions and speak up for yourself, and don’t be afraid to say so.  If you feel that this is too far gone for you to address, you can always seek the assistance of a therapist, who might be able to gently bring this issue to light and help you both work through it.