Dear Andreus,

I realize that I don’t want to be married anymore.  My husband and I have been together for 5 years, and so much has changed.  This is not at all the life or relationship that I envisioned for myself.  We have been to counseling, and even tried to spice up our sex life.  There is just a huge emotional disconnect for me, that I cannot get over.  The worst part is that I have enough love for him, that it hurts me to do something like this, and I am struggling with whether I should leave or just stay and not break his heart.  Do you have any suggestions?


Mischa P.

Dear Mischa,

I can’t tell you to leave or to stay.  That is not really my call.  Only you know in your heart what the right thing is for you to do.  Think about it long and hard.  Is it something that just absolutely cannot be worked out?  Are the issues something that you can get over and somehow find happiness again.  Are you beyond the point of no return?  How much have you tried to work together, outside of counseling?  The only thing I can say is weigh all your options out before you make any decisions, but also don’t linger long enough without any type of action allowing love to change into resentment.  I hope this helps in some way.