Hey Woody,

Is there such a thing as a Sexual IQ test? What questions does it ask? I want to know if I’d pass.

-Dying to ask

Hey Woody,

Is there such a thing as a Sexual IQ test? What questions does it ask? I want to know if I’d pass.

-Dying to ask

Dear Dying,

There’s no such thing as a Sexual IQ test, so naturally I made one up. Hey, like I’ve always said, “If you see a hole, fill it.” So are you an ignorant slut, a knowledgeable prude or something in between? Take the test and find out:

1. What is considered the “Male G-spot?”

a. the prostate

b. the frenulum

c. The wallet

2. Where is the “Male G-spot?”

a. A couple of inches inside the anus towards the navel

b. A couple of inches inside the urethra towards the bladder

c. A couple of inches inside the Abercrombie & Fitch catalog towards the underwear section

3. The main source of a man’s orgasmic pleasure is:

a. pelvic floor muscle contractions

b. release of semen

c. Access to your boyfriend’s AMEX card

4. The two most important actions in giving manual or oral stimulation are:

a. Speed & friction

b. Pressure & force

c. Crate & Barrel

5. You can delay a man’s orgasm by:

a. Gently tugging his scrotum sack away from his body

b. Gently pushing his face into a rainbow flag pillow

c. Slowing down the speed of his thrusts

6. You can help your man achieve stronger erections and more powerful orgasms by:

a. Doing pelvic floor muscle exercises together

b. Trying to climax together

c. Faking yours

7. The most important combination for performing mind-blowing oral sex on a man is:

a. Generating lots of saliva and using your hand as an extension of your mouth

b. Using personal lubrication and re-creating his thrusting motions.

c. Blindfolding him so he doesn’t see what you look like.

8. After sex, most men want to roll over and go to sleep because:

a. sex depletes energy-producing glycogen from their muscles

b. they’re not that interested in talking afterwards

c. You didn’t turn into a pepperoni pizza.

9. Pushing a finger upwards on the perineum will press on what pleasure gland?

a. the prostate

b. the bladder

c. The checkbook

10. When your man is about to orgasm you should:

a. Keep doing what you’re doing

b. Keep doing what you’re doing, but put the magazine down

c. Keep doing what you’re doing, but speed it up and apply more friction

11. The best way to find out what your man likes in bed is to:

a. Ask him

b. Try different things and gage his reaction

c. Try different things with his best friend and gage his reaction

12. The best thing you can do to make your man feel like a stud is to:

a. Respond vocally and physically to what he’s doing.

b. Be passive and let him take charge

c. Pretend you’re not there

13. The best oral sex:

a. Starts slowly and builds to a crescendo

b. Ends by deep-throating

c. Is a three-man job


Points: a =3, b=0, c=0

0-12  Sit down. We gotta talk. If things don’t improve people will start thinking you’re straight.

13-25  Not bad. But do you really want guys describing you as “Not bad in bed?”

26-39  Wow! You’re a hormone with feet. Congratulations!

Download Woody’s ebook, Meet The Hottie In The Corner–

The 21 Day Plan To Overcome Your Fear of Rejection, Master the Art of Icebreakers and Snag Guys You Never Thought You Could Get. Available at: