Dear Andreus,
I have a co-worker who likes me. Well, I like him also. We met at a local bar after work one day for drink and ended up having sex. Now when we are at work, I feel awkward because he is literally all over me. He tries to be touchy-feely and says inappropriate things around my other co-workers. I am afraid to go to HR because I don’t want to lose my job. What do I do?
Sincerely,
Pierce C.
Dear Pierce,
It is a rule of thumb to not have personal relationships with the people that you work with. Now, clearly things have gotten out of hand. What you can do, is talk to him outside of work and let him know that his behavior is unprofessional. If for some reason you wish to continue a personal relationship, any intimate behavior must be outside of work, or maybe one of you should transfer to another location if possible. If that does not help, then warn him that you will go to HR. If this becomes a problem, you may not have a choice but to go to HR, and you might want to do it before he possibly does. Hope this was a worthwhile learning experience!
Dear Andreus,
My husband wants to move his father into our house because he is elderly and needs supervision due to health issues and his frailness. I do care for his family, and his father is pretty much all his has left besides his sister, however, I am not sure that this is the best decision. We have two small dogs and would have to modify our home with bars in the tubs, showers and along the hallways. Also, his father’s health requires a lot of attention, and he wants us to take shifts caring for him. I am not up to the responsibility. I work from home, and am at home more than him, but I do not have the time to give his father the proper attention. My husband says I am being selfish. I don’t know what to do.
Sincerely,
Rolando P.
Dear Rolando,
There is a saying: “Once a man, twice a child.” As our parents age, it is inevitable that we will end up caring for them. However, how we chose to do that needs to be carefully executed considering the role of every person involved. You know what you can do, and if you are not able to give his father the proper attention because of your obligations with work, that is understandable. If it is necessary to have him come to live with you both, then maybe you can talk about having a caregiver. Otherwise, your husband may need to adjust his schedule to meet his father’s needs. After all, it is his father and that is not your primary responsibility. Sit down, talk it out, and come to a solid agreement. Make sure that you are both comfortable with the agreement, because it can have a lasting effect on your relationship. Best of luck to you both!
